


I Touch Myself

by Nylazor



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age II
Genre: Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, M/M, Masturbation, Past Rape/Non-con, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-04
Updated: 2019-01-04
Packaged: 2019-10-04 00:22:32
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 975
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17294117
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nylazor/pseuds/Nylazor
Summary: Fenris masturbates while thinking of Hawke





	I Touch Myself

**Author's Note:**

> http://scarmonaspron.tumblr.com/post/181361787592/hello-i-started-playing-da2-so-heres-some-soft
> 
> This person is amazing and I like their porn *blushes*
> 
> Unedited unbetad

Fenris eased off his armour until he was just in his leggings when he fell back on his bed. It was worn, unmade and unwashed, he could smell his own sweat with the aftertaste of old cum. He ignored this and determinedly put his hand down his pants. He just lay there for a moment, not even touching his cock, just getting used to the idea of the action he wanted to perform. Slowly he wrapped his hand around his cock, easing his thumb up and down its length.

 

A ghost of a feeling brushed over his thigh and he froze. He felt another one press over his nipple, his throat, his ass. He wretched his hands from pants and pushed himself upright. He could feel himself tremble and felt his cock hard between his legs. He hated this, he hated this feeling. He knew what it was, it was his memories of Danarius, more specifically his body's memories. 

 

He gritted his teeth and forced his eyes open. He reached down beside his bed and pulled a book into his lap. Hawke had been teaching him to read, and it was a distraction from the faint sensations all over his body telling him he was about to get raped again.

 

He focused on the letters, naming each letter before pushing them together to sound out a word. He felt himself twitch as old sensations pushed themselves into his mind, he growled and shook his head and focused harder on the words. He realized the were blurring a bit, he frowned and leaned in closer, only for a drop of liquid to hit the page. Fenris jerked his head back in surprise as he became aware of the burn in his throat and the ache in his eyes. He was crying!

 

He slammed the book shut and threw it aside before pulling his knees to his stomach. His cock, annoyingly was hard against his stomach. No. He couldn't cry! He wouldn't! He had to be strong! 

 

But he didn't feel strong right then. He couldn't control his own bodily reactions. He couldn't stop the tears from flowing.

 

_ “You don't have to be so strong, Fenris.” _

 

He raised his head as Hawke's words reverberated through his head.

 

_ “I mean, you are strong, and I think you always will be, but, you don't have to do it all on your own. I'm here for you, we all are.” _

 

The tears stopped and he smiled. The feeling of hands and… other things, he still felt them against his skin. However the thought of Hawke being there, for him, with him calmed him. He looked around he counted the amount of red in the room. The sense of dread decreased. He thought he had counted them all when he looked down and saw the bright red ribbon that had slid down to his wrist. He chuckled and held it close to his nose, he could  _ just _ smell Hawke, barely, but it was there. He wondered if he should ask for a new ribbon, one that smelled more of Hawke.

 

No he would looked needy!

 

_ “You don't have to be so strong, Fenris.” _

 

He frowned. Maybe… maybe he could be a little needy. Maybe he'd ask Carver to steal one of Hawke's shirts, or sneak in while they were out and take one. His frown deepened.  _ Or you could just ask. _ It was… admittedly true. He could just ask for something that smelled of Hawke. 

 

Hawke. 

 

Fenris hand slithered back into his pants and found his half hard cock.

 

Hawke kissing him. Kissing him down his neck, to his chest, to his belly, to his… He felt his face heat up. He pictured Hawke, lying between his legs with Fenris’ cock in his mouth. He looked suitably abashed, but that didn't stop him from giving Fenris the once over. Taking him to the base, sucking like it was a thing to do. He pictured Hawke with that telltale smirk and he gasped as he felt want in his loins. He threw his head back biting his lip to stay quiet.

 

But that's right, he didn't have to stay quiet here. He had the mansion to himself. He was used to hiding his pain, or more importantly his pleasure from Danarius, he hated to sound pleased when he was getting debased. But Hawke, laughing,  _ you don't have to stay quiet you know, we have the house to ourselves, I made sure. _ Hawke putting every effort into making Fenris feel good, making him cum. 

 

He heistantly let out a breathy whine as he continued to stroke himself. The thrill of it ran down his chest. It… it felt good. He moaned as loud as he dared, he felt his cock twitch. 

 

Hawke.

 

Hawke smiling at him.

 

Hawke hugging him.

 

Hawke praising him.

 

Hawke complimenting him.

 

Hawke in between his legs.

 

Hawke, bright red, as Fenris pushed his fingers inside him.

 

Hawke on his hands and knees presenting his pretty little ass to Him! To Fenris.

 

Hawke moaning.

 

Hawke begging.

 

Hawke cumming

 

Hawke.

 

Hawke.

 

Haw-

 

Fenris let out a cry as the heat that was building in his balls boiled over and he bucked his hips. The pleasure washed over him fast as it always did, with a whine he continued to stroke until it became too intense. He pulled his hand free, panting slightly.

 

How badly he wanted to be with Hawke again… but the memories. He promised himself when he finally killed Danarius everything would be right. He'd learn the truth! He'd be free! And he could be with Hawke. Finally.

 

He imagined Hawke was holding him as he pulled the pillow to his chest, how great would it be to just sleep with Hawke? He wrapped himself in blankets, both bothering to clean up his mess. 

 

Picturing Hawke, he fell asleep.

  
  
  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> I should say, Fenris is experiencing body memories, as have I not fun, he's using the techniques distract and check the facts.
> 
> Talk to me at tumblr  
> @nye-writes  
> Twitter  
> @nylazorslew  
> Email me prompts  
> nylazorslew@gmail.com  
> Comment?


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